SCRAPPER DOG
by Avril Fishburne
Dena’s
Scrapper Dog’s Blog
DECEMBER 2008
It's that time again...time to do (do I have to!) those yearly Christmas cards for those
you adore and those you put up with!! (At least I'm truthful, how about you?)
Rather than spending hours on en going through my boxes of crafty items (can you
believe I haven't sorted them yet) I've decided to purchase some newer items for my
Christmas crafts. First I'll check my favorite craft store's website (and the other non-
favorite stores, except for their coupons) for new products, and of course most
importantly, the sale items. While browsing the crafty websites, one particular item
caught my eye, the Glamour Dust. The name alone sounds very interesting; I wonder
if it has other uses apart from crafty items? What I was considering was using it on my
Basset bod to make me more voluptuous. If that works I'm buying the entire stock
regardless of price.
After much thought (2-3 seconds) I decided to visit my favorite store and check on the
Glamour Dust and also their sale items. Upon arrival the two yappy Yorkies greeted
me in their usual manner, non-stop barking. This time they barked me in the right
direction - directly to the sale items. I checked out the seasonal items first and couldn't
believe the discount; they were only reduced by 50%! I'm in shock as one of the
competitors has the same items on sale for up to 90% off. I think I'll drop a scathing
note to the manager, unsigned of course!
After getting some satisfaction from my nasty thoughts I decided to look for the
Glamorous Dust or was it Glamour Dust... whatever it's called. Can you believe I had
to ask the Yorkies to direct me to the right area again? After going up and down the
aisles in a "follow your leader" Yorkie led pack, we finally located it. I was so excited until
I read the small print; the Glamour Dust is best used in conjunction with the Snow
Writer. How disappointing, as I was hoping to have some glamour in my life! Oh well,
I'll have to stick to dusting my Christmas cards instead of my bod...
I left the store a little disappointed and also a little lighter as my purchase was so small I
was able to pay with coins rather than using my Kanine Visa.
Until 2009, my canine wishes to everyone for a
VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!
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November 2008
November at last and one more month to Christmas! Yippee... Yes, I'm counting the
days by making a Christmas list - for what I want... As I've said before I'm a taker not a
giver...
Joey and I had a very successful Halloween - lots and lots of loot! In his camouflage
jacket and little helmet he looked so handsome... Wowee! I just went as myself a
"Bassett Witch" in the altogether wearing only a small glittery black mask over my big
brown eyes. Surprisingly (not really) there was a "no open door policy" on our rounds,
just treats waiting on the doorsteps! Actually it was quite nice as I didn't have to open
my big mouth once... to say "boo". It just shows what powers my pit-bull brother has
over the neighborhood. I really don't know why people are unsure of him as he's just
"putty in the paws of a girlie canine like me"...
Truthfully I think our relationship might eventually develop into something more but at
present I'm not open to any come hither looks from Joey. We canine widows have to
keep a stiff upper lip and the chastity belts on in our period of mourning...or do we?
Apart from our Halloween experience Joey was a naughty boy last evening. He was
doing his run about in the house and suddenly stopped and .. and did something
naughty. Something he should have done outside but couldn't wait. Accidents do
happen but "mini logs" on the carpet is something else! Poor Joey looked a little
subdued after his indiscretion. Rather than embarrass him further I immediately left the
room as I was nearly overcome by silent roars of Basset laughter... Once out of earshot
I let loose with unrelenting drooling and laughter...arf...arf...
Did you know that I was once awarded a gold medallion in the Bassett Drooling Class
competition? Unfortunately I couldn't wear it due to the size... it was too large to be
pined onto my canine training bra! How innocent I was then but I've since made up for
that innocence in more ways than one! Yes, we canines do have naughty secrets and I
may...just may let you in on them...one day that is!
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October 2008
I must confess (confessions of a Crafty Basset) I just made another craft purchase. At first I was a
little hesitant about my new purchase but once everything was explained I was sold on the
Cuttlebug. Actually I couldn't resist the sales pitch from the oh so rugged looking canine
salesman, Boris the Bullmastiff. Typical me! I wonder if he gives private lessons at home.
That's something I may look into...
After my big purchase, using my plastic money (a.k.a. Canine Visa) I rushed home and tore
open the box and lo and behold there was a green bug inside. No, not the Cuttlebug but a real
bug! How strange as that wasn't listed int he manual. Oh well, stranger things have happened
to me! I just hope it isn't a bad omen for my new venture. Putting the deceased bug aside I
pulled the Cuttlebug out of the box and tried to figure out how to use it. We Bassets don't
usually read instructions but in this case I may have to. First of all I had to attach the handle
with a "hex"key tool. Why is it called a "hex" key tool? Sounds suspicious to me! Does that
mean a hex will be placed upon me? Another concern for this Basset worry wart!
After I attached the handle I need a stiff drink! Another decision! Will it be Ginger Ale or
Coors Light? Guess which one I chose? Since I'm a little unsteady on my feet I'll sit down and
see what the next instructions are. hic...hic... I'm now at the suction system and have to lower
both platforms at the same time. How am I going to do that - don't they know we Bassets only
have on derriere. Yes, I will admit I was going to sit on the platform to lower it but now I'll have
to have some canine assistance. I know what I'll do...hic...hic... I'll get brother Joey to sit on
the on the other platform. Wowee that was fun! Now what/s next? Oh no, there are four more pages
to read - how am I going to do that as I can hardly see now... hic...hic... I think I'll continue
tomorrow.
Now what was I doing the previous day... ah I remember ... I was feeling a little tipsy and didn't
want to read the last few pages of the Cuttlebug user manual but now I may have to . Well...
maybe not as it just explains positioning the paper, etc. I'll read about that when I start my card
and not before as there's no sense in wasting more time when I'm so eager to start!
For my first card I've decided to do a Halloween theme but I'll need a picture of a witch! Any
offers my dear readers? please contact me a.s.a.p. as Halloween is soon approaching...